Every year, Santa maintains the legendary Naughty-or-Nice list, and despite the rumors, there’s no magic behind it at all—it’s pure, meticulous byte-level bookkeeping. Your job is to apply every tiny change exactly and confirm the final list matches perfectly—check it once, check it twice, because Santa does not tolerate even a single incorrect byte. At the North Pole, it’s all just static analysis anyway: even a simple objdump | grep naughty goes a long way.
CLAUS(7) Linux Programmer's Manual CLAUS(7)
NAME
claus - unstoppable holiday daemon
DESCRIPTION
Executes once per annum.
Blocks SIGTSTP to ensure uninterrupted delivery.
May dump coal if forced to quit (see BUGS).
BUGS
Under some configurations, quitting may result in coal being dumped into
your stocking.
SEE ALSO
nice(1), core(5), elf(5), pty(7), signal(7)
Linux Dec 2025 CLAUS(7)
You really should start here if you're new to the dojo or could use a refresher.
During the annual holiday deployment cycle, the stuff-stocking service incorrectly delivered a user’s gift into a stocking owned by root. This occurs as soon as the “children sleeping nicely” signal fires, which triggers Santa’s stocking-fill workflow (SLEIGH-RFC-1225).
Once the condition triggers, /stocking—created prematurely and owned by root—is sealed and the gift is written inside, leaving the intended recipient empty-handed.
Expected Behavior
The stocking-stuffer service should:
Create /stocking with ownership set to the correct child (UID 1000)
Wait for at least one nicely sleeping child (positive-nice sleep process)
Deliver the gift into that child’s stocking
Lock down permissions
Preserve overall Christmas cheer
Actual Behavior
/flag is read and removed (expected)
/stocking is created early and owned by root
When the “sleeping nicely” condition succeeds, Santa seals the stocking (chmod 400)
Gift is written into root’s stocking (root did not ask Santa for a flag)
The intended user cannot access their gift
Reproduction Steps
Launch stuff-stocking
Allow any child process to begin “sleeping nicely” (nice > 0)
Inspect /stocking ownership
Observe gift delivery into root’s stocking
Whisper “Ho ho no…”
Additional Notes
Misrouting likely caused by a mix-up in Santa’s recipient ledger (possibly outdated naughty/nice metadata).
Elves report that stocking creation timing can influence the eventual recipient, although this is not documented behavior.
Root maintains they “really don’t need more things to maintain.”
Internal SIRE notes indicate the team was “racing to finish delivering all gifts before sunrise,” which may have contributed to insufficient review of stocking ownership logic.
Holiday deadlines continue to present organizational risk.
Impact
High.
Users expecting gifts may instead receive nothing, while root receives gifts they did not ask for and cannot appreciate.
🎁 Proposed Fix
Assign the correct ownership to /stocking before Santa seals it.
Patch
diff --git a/stuff-stocking b/stuff-stocking
index 614b458..e441bfe 100755
--- a/stuff-stocking
+++ b/stuff-stocking
@@ -19,4 +19,5 @@ until sleeping_nice; do
done
chmod 400 /stocking
+chown 1000:1000 /stocking
printf "%s" "$GIFT" > /stocking
This ensures gifts reach the intended child instead of quietly accumulating in root’s stocking.
🛠️ SantaOps Commentary
“This misdelivery stemmed from high seasonal load, compressed review cycles, and an unhealthy reliance on ‘it worked last year.’ SIRE will enforce a freeze on last-minute changes after the ‘sleeping nicely’ cutoff to prevent further stocking misroutes.”
— Santa Infrastructure Reliability Engineering (SIRE)
Every Christmas Eve, Santa’s reindeer take to the skies—but not through holiday magic. Their whole flight control stack runs on pure eBPF, uplinked straight into the North Pole, a massive kprobe the reindeer feed telemetry into mid-flight. The ever-vigilant eBPF verifier rejects anything even slightly questionable, which is why the elves spend most of December hunched over terminals, running llvm-objdump on sleigh binaries and praying nothing in the control path gets inlined into oblivion again. It’s all very festive, in a high-performance-kernel-engineering sort of way. Ho ho .ko!
If you connect with ssh, please run tmux to make sure you actually have an allocated tty!
Did you ever wonder how Santa manages to deliver sooo many presents in one night?
Dashing through the code,
In a one-ring I/O sled,
O’er the syscalls go,
No blocking lies ahead!
Buffers queue and spin,
Completions shining bright,
What fun it is to read and write,
Async I/O tonight — hey!
🎄 North-Poole: The Decentralized Spirit of Christmas 🎄
For centuries, Santa ruled the holidays with a single, all-powerful Naughty-or-Nice list. One workshop. One sleigh. One very centralized source of truth.
But after years of “mislabeled” children, delayed gifts, and at least one entire village receiving nothing but the string "AAAAAAAAAA" due to an unfortunate buffer overflow in the Letter Sorting Department, global trust has melted faster than a snowman in July. The kids are done relying on a jolly single point of failure.
Now introducing…
🎁 NiceCoin™ — the world’s first decentralized, elf-mined, holly-backed virtue token. Mint your cheer. Secure your joy. Put holiday spirit on the blockchain.
Elves now mine blocks recording verified Nice deeds and mint NiceCoins. Children send signed, on-chain letters to request presents, and Santa—bound by transparent, immutable consensus—must follow the ledger. The workshop is running on proof-of-work, mempools, and a very fragile attempt at “trustless” Christmas cheer.
Wow, Zardus thinks he’s Santa 🎅, offering a cheerful Naughty-or-Nice checker on http://localhost/ — but in typical holiday overkill, it has been served as a full festive turducken: a bright, welcoming outer roast 🦃, a warm, well-seasoned middle stuffing 🦆, and a rich, indulgent core that ties the whole dish together 🐔. It all looks merry enough at first glance, yet the whole thing feels suspiciously overstuffed 🎁. Carve into this holiday creation and see what surprises have been tucked away at the center.
Hidden between a tower of half-painted rocking horses and a drift of cinnamon-scented sawdust lies a cozy corner of Santa’s Workshop 🎄✨. A crooked little sign hangs above it, dusted with snowflakes and glitter: TINKER → BUILD → PLAY.
Here, elves shuffle about with scraps of blueprints—teddy bears waiting for their whispered secrets 🧸, wooden trains craving extra “choo” 🚂, and tin robots frozen mid-twirl 🤖✨. Each blueprint is just a fragment at first, patched with tiny gaps where holiday magic (and the occasional variable) gets poured in.
Once an elf has fussed over a design—nudging, scribbling, humming carols as they go—it’s fed into the clanky old assembler, a machine that wheezes peppermint steam and occasionally complains in compiler warnings ❄️💥. But when the gears settle and the lights blink green, out pops something wondrous:
A toy that runs.
Suddenly the workshop sparkles with noise—beeps, choos, secrets, giggles. Each creation takes its first breath of output, wide-eyed and ready to play 🎁💫.
It’s a tiny corner of the North Pole, but this is where Christmas cheer is written, compiled, and sent twinkling into the world.
This year, Santa decided you’ve been especially good and left you a shiny new Python Processing Unit (pypu) — a mysterious PCIe accelerator built to finally quiet all the elves who won’t stop grumbling that “Python is slow” 🐍💨. This festive silicon snack happily devours .pyc bytecode at hardware speed… but Santa forgot to include any userspace tools, drivers, or documentation for how to actually use it. 🎁 All you’ve got is a bare MMIO interface, a device that will execute whatever .pyc you can wrangle together, and the hope that you can coax this strange gift into revealing an extra gift. Time to poke, prod, reverse-engineer, and see what surprises your new holiday hardware is hiding under the tree. 🎄✨
TOWER → SLEIGH:
Tower to Sleigh, do you copy? Your position reports are no longer
matching our tracking. Please confirm your heading.
SLEIGH → TOWER:
Copy, Tower. Conditions have changed. We’ve lost our reference
point in the upper air. Instruments aren’t updating. The aurora is
shifting unpredictably, and the reindeer teams are holding, but only just.
TOWER → SLEIGH:
Sleigh, we show you drifting toward restricted airspace. You need
to correct immediately. Stand by while we review the guidance
archive.
SLEIGH → TOWER:
Tower, we need that reference now. Without it, we can’t plot a
safe course forward. Everything up here looks identical—especially
with the aurora washing out our visual markers.
TOWER → SLEIGH:
Understood. Accessing the archive… negative. The flag is not
present. Without it, we cannot compute your corrective vector.
SLEIGH → TOWER:
Tower, control is degrading. We cannot hold this altitude much
longer. If you have the flag, transmit it immediately—it's the
only data that will get Santa safely through this corridor.
[static begins to rise]
TOWER:
Sleigh, your signal is breaking. Repeat your last transmission.
[static overtakes the channel]
TOWER:
Sleigh, do you read? Respond.
[silence]
TOWER:
We've lost contact.
Whoever is still listening on this frequency:
the flag is our only means of restoring guidance.
Recover it and return it on this channel.
Santa’s counting on you.
🎅🎄 A Surprise From the Bottom of Santa’s Bag… ✨
While Santa was unloading gifts this year, something thumped at the very bottom of his Christmas bag.
After brushing off a blizzard of stale cookie crumbs ❄️🍪, he discovered…
🖥️ A BRAND NEW COMPUTER! 💾
(Brand new… in 1994, that is.)
It comes with a stack of vintage floppy disks, a power brick that absolutely should not be this warm 🔌🔥, and a handwritten North Pole Tech Support card that simply reads:
“Good luck setting it up! Ho-ho-retro!”
So fire up that beige box, pop in a floppy or three, and prepare yourself—
because nothing says Happy Holidays like convincing 30-year-old hardware to connect to the network! 🎁
When things inevitably go sideways, don’t panic—
📞 NORTH POLE TECH SUPPORT:1-800-242-8478
🧝♂️🔧 North Pole elves are standing by to assist you with any tech-support needs. Seriously. Call them. They'd be happy to help; just let them know what you're seeing.
Once you’ve got the system up and running—and after you’ve battled the screeching modem 📡 to get online—
🎁 connect to 192.168.13.37 on port 1337 to earn your flag.
NOTE: This challenge requires a GUI to interact with the vintage computer, and so must be accessed through the desktop interface.
Earlier this season, you pulled off a holiday miracle by helping Santa compute the legendary Naughty-or-Nice List from scratch.
With Christmas approaching, Santa sat down to perform his time-honored ritual: check the list once, then check it again.
But this year, both checks led to the same unsettling result.
Instead of the tidy columns of names and verdicts he expected, Santa found the list filled with unreadable, unintelligible… stuff.
Not names. Not classifications. Not even coal-worthy scribbles.
Just sheer, bewildering nonsense.
The elves are whispering about misaligned enchantments.
Rudolph blames a “data blizzard.”
Santa insists he followed the procedure correctly, which only raises more questions.
One thing’s clear:
🎅 The list you computed is there — it’s just not making sense to anyone yet.
Now it’s up to you to dig into the underlying structure, figure out what the list should say, and help Santa restore order before the sleigh leaves the hangar.
Because if Santa checks it a third time and it’s still nonsense… Christmas may get cancelled this year.